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n+1: World Cup Preview

In case you’re not quite sure how all the teams fit, here is a brief summary. Some select quotes to tempt you.

On Australia:

It is tempting to describe the Australian team as a bigger, better version of the New Zealand team. I am going to succumb to that temptation.

Serbia:

Their fans are really scary and hardcore and some of their players are too, especially Nemanja Vidic, who looks and acts like a Soviet bad guy in an ’80s Bond film.

Japan:

Japan is not very good at soccer, but it has the world’s highest average life expectancy.

and New Zealand:

Now Australia qualifies out of Asia, and so New Zealand’s qualifying campaign consisted of beating up on teams like Tonga and the Solomon Islands and then winning a playoff against Bahrain. New Zealand beat Serbia in a friendly, and the Serbian fans were so embarrassed to have lost to New Zealand that they rioted. Or else they rioted because they were Serbian soccer fans—it’s hard to say.

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